Tag: presence

Time Flies

Watching as you stand up tall.

You used to hardly move at all.

No phrase can lead to more regret

Than “Isn’t it your nap time yet?”

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Dare to be Fascinated Again: A Lesson from my Four Month Old

I think we tragically lose our fascination with simplicity as we get older. Caught up in the rush of an ever-changing world, our attention spans stay relatively short while the list of criteria for our admiration grows longer and longer. Then there are children.

Today, I was clipping my toenails (you’re welcome).

As I did so, my four month old baby boy was on his belly playing with some cloud thing that lights up when you smack it. I began to clip and suddenly, that little cloud took a backseat to what was clearly the most delightfully wild thing Aidan has seen to date. It was precious.

With every clipping sound, Aidan would get wide-eyed, squeal with delight, and flail about. He would then get still and watch, captivated as I moved to the next toe. I’d clip the nail, and the process would begin again.

Now, obviously, my point here isn’t that you should stare at people and giggle as they clip their toenails.

Weirdo. Unless you’re into that. Do you.

Anyway, my point is that we are so caught up in the rat race of life that we miss a lot of great things.

We miss the intricate cloud formations drifting across a blue sky.

We miss the nonverbal cues of loved ones we are barely listening to as we try to process our own day while eating dinner.

We miss the chill in an October wind that blows scattered leaves in swirls along the ground.

We miss the joyful feeling of laughter in our friends, family, and even ourselves.

I’m sure you can think back to a ton of situations today that you just “floated” through. It’s so easy to get caught up in trying to do or be things that we forget to just “be.” I think it’s time we take a lesson from our little ones and find a way to see the miracles in life again.

Peace be with you!

A Prayer Problem

‘Pause a while and know that I am God, exalted among the nations, exalted over the earth.’ — Psalm 46:10, JB

I grew severely frustrated last night as I tried to engage in some good ol’ fashioned prayer. Words came and were thought/said/expressed, but it just felt like total and utter nonsense. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t the object of my prayer (the Light). I felt God was there, as It always is.

What bothered me was the practice itself. The words came effortlessly, and they sounded just like the fancy kind of seminary-influenced words that get you compliments at Thanksgiving. It should have been a moment of great connection with the Divine.

But it wasn’t. Those words were hollow and empty. The more I said, the more full of crap I felt.

Even the trusty, “magical” prayers of tradition were ineffectual. Hail Mary, the Lord’s Prayer, the Jesus Prayer, all just ringing about in the air like annoying cymbals.

So I stopped. I just quit trying, and I unexpectedly felt more peace, release, and connection as I just stood there brooding in the shower. I reflected on this experience this morning and I think I’ve nailed down my issue.

Life is supppsed to be prayer.

In the Quaker faith, we worship in silence, waiting to experience… whatever happens. Ideally, there’s no agenda or attempt to “get anything.” Silence allows God and the heart to commune however they need to. We acknowledge that all people, things, places, and times are sacred… we just have to acknowledge it.

When one walks with the Divine in every moment of every day… there really isn’t much to be said. God is here. Our thoughts, our struggles, our triumphs, our questions, all things happen in the presence of the Source of it all. God doesn’t need directions, information, or pursuasion.

What is needed, most times, is for us to shut up, and “pause a while and know” that God is there. That’s what I was missing last night. I went for words and formulas when I should’ve just silently dropped all of the distractions and shared in God’s “being,” recognizing the sanctity of that moment and everyone in it, just like we do at our Quaker meeting.

It’s important to remember that, as promised, the Divine is with us “always; yes, to the end of time” (Matthew 28:20). We don’t have to hit our knees, say the right things, or even say anything at all. What God desires is for our hearts to draw near and bask in the sacred Presence, the holiness of everyday life.

So if you are seeking connection with the Light, if you are trying to pray, but the words don’t feel right, perhaps they’re not meant to. Our world is full of words and noise, but it lacks stillness and peace. It could be that these are what God is trying to offer you. So sit back and enjoy.

Peace be with you!

***AFTER-THOUGHT***

I am not saying prayer with words is bad or a sign of spiritual immaturity or somesuch nonsense. Pray in whatever way helps you connect! This post was simply geared toward those moments when words fall short. Do what draws you closest to the Sacred in all things!